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Everything King: Does finding new relatives seem inviting? Really?

I'd rather not (and there is no spitting required)
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So, it's big business and of interest to millions of people around the world. Except me!

Tracing your roots, researching your family tree, finding out about your ancestors.

There are all kinds of websites and even that TV show “Who Do You Think You Are?

Little leaves are flying around like crazy on Ancestry.com. The sell line is “Find new relatives”! That’s seems inviting? Really?

No thanks! I try to avoid contact with most of the ones I’ve got. (Except for the ones who read this blog — you, I like)

I want no new relatives coming to visit. Ever. The ones who DO have to stay in a motel.

The procedure to trace the DNA grosses me right out.

Did you know you have to spit into a test tube and send it off in an envelope to Dublin, Ireland. (Is it just coincidence that Ireland is home to the Blarney Stone?) Ick! No! There will be no spitting!

I don’t know if you have to “pee” on a stick for any of these companies — but I’m not doing that either.

Let’s face it, don’t most people just want to find out if they are related to movie stars, royalty or rich people?

The folks in the commercials always find out George Washington is their great, great, great something.

So then, if you find that out, it behooves you to redecorate with wooden teeth and cherry trees.

Who wants to know if they are related to crazy Uncle Horace? That’s not exciting. In fact, best to keep him hidden under a big branch.

What if you are related to a serial killer? Do they tell you that or is that leaf left covered over?

I just think the whole venture seems like a lot of effort and postage!

Wouldn't a guest spot on Maury Povich be easier? He knows a lot about DNA. 

Although, I think you likely have to pee there!

I  wonder if these people know you can find out the same things for free using Facebook.  

It is true. With one click on a quiz, I have found out my spirit animal, the colour of my aura, my celebrity crush, and who my twin is based on my favourite songs. 

Easier, cheaper and no spitting required!



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About the Author: Wendy King

Wendy King writes about all kinds of things from nutrition to the job search from cats to clowns — anything and everything — from the ridiculous to the sublime. Watch for Wendy's column weekly.
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